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Welcome to A Writer's Landscape!

You have entered the realm of my mind where words play with the fabric of our existence. This is the map of my imagination: the very foundations of inspiration, musing, and thought splayed for your wandering eyes. Dive deep into the tides of these forces and experience my reality, my fantasy, my world; and if you should be so inclined, share your words with this land.

Peace and Love!

J Hart F

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

To Lots of Ladybugs (2011)

It’s a simple phrase from a beautiful movie which resonates so intensely with my life. This saying comes from Under the Tuscan Sun (which I haven’t read yet... but apparently it’s a fairly good book as well). Let me explain the meaning quickly and then I’ll show you how it relates to my life. Ladybugs, in the movie, represents a desire, a want, an aspiration which seemed extremely unattainable. Several ladies in the movie were in pursuit of ‘ladybugs,’ which seemed to be progressively avoiding their eager aims. Once these ladies simply stopped trying to acquire their ‘ladybugs,’ they came in plentiful droves.

Alright... it seems fairly easy to equate this to my life. For the past two years, my New Years Resolution has always been “To Lots of Ladybugs,” and this year is no different. However, there has been a shift in my understanding of what this means. I have always taken this saying as a motivator toward inaction, in a way. This isn’t to say that I didn’t do anything toward getting what I wanted. I’ve taken many actions; however, they were minor steps in a grand scheme. So this year, I’m addressing my outlook towards “Lots of Ladybugs” and assessing the effectiveness of the laid back tendencies I’ve gone towards. Thus, here are my resolutions for 2011 (though I'd rather call them commitments because resolutions, though it stands as a firm decision, still has a connotation of being a little wishy-washy).

1) Be completely honest. We can all thank Temperance Brennan from the show Bones for this commitment. Her attitude toward complete honesty without judgement has inspired me to do the same... well, to do similarly. I still don't think I have it in me to be so brutally honest without some sort of filter; but the intent remains that my honesty will be without reservation. Most of all... I have to be honest with myself. I've been denying the essence of honesty for myself for a very long time: happiness, desires, spirituality, etc. So many barriers have been built to deny me true happiness, all built because society instructed me to have these restraints.

2) To write more. Though I have successfully filled this blog with posts ranging from abstract poetry to an intense short story (which turned into a serial), including some poetic prose and existential thought processes, I feel I can do more. I want to finish a second book. And that shall be my ultimate goal this year.

3) To edit. This includes many facets of my life. I was told that editing is a very spiritual experience. Why shouldn't I then admit this adventure to my life, first in my writing and then letting it expand to other areas.

4) To be myself. I want to be a relaxed and fun individual. Unfortunately, I've felt very uptight and serious this past year. This is mostly due to the intense drive I had to get my Associate of Arts from Front Range Community College and transfer schools; but now I'm committing to enjoying my time at my new college, with my new friends, at my new job, and with my new goals! Life is suppose to be fun, right? Then why shouldn't I get to partake?

5) To strive for the appearance I've longed for. This includes every aspect I've mentioned so far and goes so far as to declare that I will be exercising a lot more. I've already joined a gym. I'm on a soccer team now. I'm not sitting at my computer nearly as much as I was before (though a long for a bit of World of Warcraft every once in a while). This year, so far, has already shifted my expectations for fun-time and I'm enjoying it!

This all seems appropriate to share on the first new moon of the year. It's a new beginning, the new cycle. Today is the first day of change. From here, we shall see the difference in my writing. Just wait! You will all experience my resolution to experiencing "Lots of Ladybugs"!

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